Funny Kids Book Author From Lancashire
Hi, I’m a Children’s Fiction Author from Lancashire. I write or author funny kids books for age 7 upwards and rhyming picture books for young children aged 4-7 years.
Future Funny Kids Lancashire Book Releases
In my upcoming funny children’s fiction book for age 7 and up, a teenage girl comes of age on a funny adventure with her sister, cousins & archaeologist grandad. It is like an ageing INDIANA JONES escaping THE LOST WORLD of the dragon-like Fangazoo. 30,000 words of middle-grade fun in an action-packed, sea and jungle quest with nail-biting plot twists.
Please Help Publish My Funny Kids Books
After helping 6,000 people in 6 years on the 999 ambulances, I was injured in the line of duty. Sadly, the ambulance service terminated my 999 ambulance job during COVID-19 lockdown and my young family and I have fallen on hard times.
To escape my broken body whilst injured, I fulfilled a 30-year ambition, lived a vivid adventure of the mind and wrote funny kids’ books for my children whilst recovering from my injuries.
Could you help me publish the book with a donation? READ MORE HERE
I need help with the costs of a professional edit, illustration and publishing of my funny kids’ books.
Please donate any amount you like by clicking the secure link to PayPal below.
Donate any amount – for a brilliant £15 (or more!) I will send you a copy of the finished book if you like!
If there is enough interest I will crowdfund the book.
I am hopeful that the perfect publisher will contact me to provide the perfect home for my latest book.
How to do a Lockdown Haircut at Home with our Funny Kids Hair Suck Cut!
This is a top YouTube ranking funny video with our children of how to cut men’s hair in lockdown. It was shot and produced on a standard mobile phone and is a fun way to involve the kids (and a vacuum cleaner!!) to cut your husband’s hair at home!
Why not let me add a little pizzazz to your social media and website – I also do Website SEO & Social Media see: WWW.ECKY-THUMP.COM
R.K. Alker Children’s Author from Lancashire seeks a book publisher – listen to the story of how I came to write funny books for my children and find out about the little green man in makeup!
A bit of fun with a kids’ quick, no yeast, eggless pizza recipe with Franki and The Chilliman in the kitchen!
GET THE RECIPE CLICK HERE – Serves: 4 – Cooking Time: 10 minutes
…I also like to cook, did it for a living for a while as The ChilliMan from Little Green Men for more details see the Press Section Click Here
LEARN TO GROW THE INGREDIENTS in my KIDS GARDENING SECTION Click Here
Coming Soon – Funny Kids Books Drawing Competition For Children
Subscribe to the Newsletter – To Read More Click Here
INSTAGRAM - R.K. Alker is a Famous, Funny, Celebrity Children’s Author, Grower, Cook, Local Food Evangelist and an injured 999 Emergency Ambulanceman. His love for growing chillies made him the country’s highest profile chilli grower, champion of local producers and star of TV, radio and press.
I am available for bookings.
Please get in touch using the contact form below.
Free School Visits Reading Funny Kids Books
I do offer some Free School Author Visits Click Here for more details
Available for reading funny kids books, talks and workshops.
Book Club Visits Reading Funny Children’s Books
Available for reading funny children’s books.
Author and Funny Kids Book Events
Readings, workshops, demonstrations, cookery, gardening, possibly chillies and much more! (read on for an explanation)
R.K. Alker Funny Children’s Christian Author reading from the Fangazoo children’s rhyming picture book
The Story of My Writing Journey
I have swooned to and from writing children’s fiction for thirty years, but life always got in the way, mainly in a good way!
Just before my 50th birthday I suffered a serious knee injury whilst helping to save a life. A fair trade I thought – my health for theirs.
The silver lining was that whilst immobile I was struck by the irresistible urge to write for my children, and I began to write children’s books in verse.
My Kids Book Was Like Magic Beans
I have always loved the Julia Donaldson kids books and bizarrely I settled on a fantasy dragon-like beast whilst watching The Last Leg comedy programme on Channel 4 about the Koala Gala, and my funny kids books ideas began to blossom geometrically.
I wrote a series of funny kids books in verse.
The Funny Children’s Book Beanstalk
Then I was struck by the brilliant thought that I could combine two of the rhyming kids books into a plot. I began to pen a whacky action-adventure in the funny children’s book category dominated by the amazing David Walliams and David Baddiel.
I sat in front of my notepad and laptop furiously dreaming the hours away as I lived the exhilarating adventure of the two sisters, their grandad and cousins against the menacing dragon-like Fangazoo beast. My heart was racing as I laid down chapter after chapter of this funny 30,000-word middle-grade fiction book.
“The first draft is just you telling yourself the story.” Terry Pratchett
The edit took much longer than the first draft, but like the late great Terry Pratchett said “The first draft is just you telling yourself the story.”
The Funny Children’s Fiction Golden Egg
I have a funny and exciting kids fiction book for children aged 7-12 years, with the added benefit of helping me through the rehabilitation of my knee.
It has not been a full recovery in terms of my knee injury. Sadly, North West Ambulance Service NHS Trust terminated my employment, due to my knee injury, at the height of COVID-19 lockdown citing my incapacity to perform the 999 ambulance role. Since then, times have been hard for me, my wife and young children.
Kids’ Author Hopes & Dreams
My greatest hope, my dream, my prayer for the continuation of my silver lining is that I can start a new career, at age 50 – a late bloomer in the field of funny children’s fiction books.
R.K. Alker is an author of funny kids books from Chorley, Lancashire, England, United Kingdom.
Some literature that is not in the category of Funny Kids Books (and not from Lancashire!)
New Children’s Book That Helps Kids Fall Asleep Is Now A #1 Best-Seller.
Bedtime for us has been a challenge and any book that helps a child fall asleep is mandatory!
Why Reading the Same Book Repeatedly Is Good for Kids (Even If It Drives You Nuts)
Any parent knows that reading to your child is a source of growth and I read an article recently that recommends reading the same book repeatedly – even if it drives you crazy!
Children’s Book Grows Into a Tree When You Plant It
On the theme of growth. I was once one of the UK’s highest profile chilli growers and when I read about a book that grew into a tree I had to had to take a look.
Contact RK Alker Funny Children’s Writer From Lancashire Here
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FAQs – Children’s Author & Funny Kids’ Book Writing FAQ
Who is the best children’s book author?
R.K. Alker is the best children’s author in the world according to my little girls! Of course, there are kids’ author mega stars out there – I am climbing the Google rankings.
Who is the popular children’s story writer?
R.K. Alker Children’s Author now ranks #1 on Google as a children's story writer alongside the mega stars of the writing industry like Julia Donaldson, David Walliams and Roald Dahl. Watch my children’s writer videos to see how my funny kids’ books ended up so very highly ranked in the children's writing industry.
How do you become a children’s author?
1. Be good enough at English and Creative Writing to write a funny children’s book.
2. Get inspiration and a brilliant idea for a funny book for kids.
3. Read, read, read as many kids’ books as you can in your chosen field of children’s fiction or kids' writing genre.
4. Start writing that award winning funny book for children. Will your funny book into existence. Write a children’s book plot or just ‘fly by the seat of your pants’ and see where the kids' book writing journey takes you.
5. Read and reread you kid’s book. Edit your funny children’s book and keep improving the kids' book until you cannot improve any further.
6. Consider a proof-reader or an editor for your funny book for kids.
7. Take the plunge to try and hook a children’s literary agent, children's book publisher or even self-publish your funny kids' fiction masterpiece.
RK Alker is an author of funny children’s books from Lancashire, England, United Kingdom, Earth!
My little girls think I am the Best Funny Kids Author in the World.
R.K. Alker is a Famous, Funny, Celebrity Children’s Author, Grower, Cook, Local Food Evangelist and an injured 999 Emergency Ambulanceman. His love for growing chillies made him the country’s highest profile chilli grower, champion of local producers and star of TV, radio and press.
Read RK Alker Funny Kids’ Author’s amazing story CLICK HERE
RK Alker is an author of funny children’s books, a famous chilli grower, cook, local food evangelist and food and drink event specialist from Lancashire, England, United Kingdom, Earth!
Find RK Alker Children’s Author Events, Book Readings, Children’s Bedtime Stories, Kids Storytelling, School Visits, Children’s Book Signings and more on Eventbrite.
My little girls think R.K. Alker is The World’s Best Kids’ Author.